Pregnant Ladies Take Over Orange County

The” P” word! Very sad to say that this article is not about Penis but about pregnancy. I call it the “P” word because I really think that it is being used in a Loosey Goosey fashion lately. I just found out that the third girl in my close group of girlfriends in pregnant. 

So…..whats a girl who’s never been married and doesn’t have kids to do when everything’s popping up babies in Orange County? Well, I have a few options: a) compensate for the prego ladies, or b) relate as best as I can c) joke about it.

Compensate

Sorry ladies. You can’t drink, you’re fat, you can’t travel, for the first time in your life you’re not excited to shop, and you now have to give up many of your favorite foods. Yup….it sucks. There’s no other way to say it. Time for me to compensate. Cosmopolitans for the bar! Wait. I’m not in a bar. OK….Cosmo’s for me and my dog!

I did thousand steps, a workout in Laguna Beach yesterday. I will continue to be able to fit into my skinny jeans, and buy them in every color should I choose to do so. Worry about not being able to fit into them in a few months? Out the window!

I was so excited to see that the Groupon today was for Yama Sushi in Mission Viejo. Purchase! Gotta love some fresh salmon sushi from the restaurant that was voted #1 sushi restaurant in Orange County. Yes. It’s the little things in life, not the little things growing inside of you.

Relate

I love it when people say their dogs are their kids. I think this is quite possibly the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard. I do not have kids, but would venture to say that dogs are probably about 5% of the work load of kids. However, right now the only thing I have to relate to my friends with is my dog. It’s really the same thing. Let me share with you a few pictures.

All babies need to be swaddled. Check out Maxine being swaddled:

My friends should really try to relate to me as well. Therefore I am buying dog teeth pacifiers for all of their babies.

I also may buy some dog piddle pads for my friends. I mean, why tie those babies down? Just put the piddle pads on the ground and my lovely friends will have less diaper changing. Problem solved. They actually may be able to learn more from my baby than I will from theirs.

Joke about It

It does look ridiculous when you go to a restaurant with three pregnant ladies. The only thing you can do is joke about it. Here are a few that I thought of off the top of my head.

Joke to the waitress: I wouldn’t come too close. It’s contagious.

When introducing them: these are my girlfriends visiting form their compound in Utah. Their husband is on his honeymoon with his newest love, wife number 4.

To men: tell them we are starting a milk tasting bar. It’s supposed to be better than wine. No really.

Start a pregnant dating website and create profiles for each of them (they are all married, but this would be funny).

That’s it. All in all, not all that bothered that I am not part of the prego pack. I read a blog post today written by Teresa Strasser titled: So, are You Having Another One? When I read the title I thought maybe it was about a girl being cut off from drinking in a bar. After I read the article I realized it was about having another baby. Surely a sign that I’m not ready……signing off. Baby-less and loving it in the OC.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/teresa-strasser/so-are-you-having-another_b_895627.html?ref=tw

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